Doing stand up comedy full-time is a dream come true, but it’s a tremendous amount of work. …

My ceiling fan idea was never supposed to catch on like this — You’ve probably already thought about this, and yes, it’s true. I invented the ceiling fan to off myself. I never intended it to become this big thing for people who needed rescue from the summer’s heat or for people who sleep under a weighted blanket with the fan and air…

Tips to help you nagivate the therapistless world — Kill her, no, don’t. But my therapist did ghost me after my third rescheduled appointment; my comedy shows were more important than my mental health because I’m empathetic and making other people laugh comes before my sanity. But enough of the oversharing, here is a list of things to do…

Set some goals and prepare for the worst — How To Vaccinate Myself Let’s be honest; people are receiving their vaccine booster shots. That means soon; there will be a fourth and fifth booster shot. I rather vaccinate myself. Just give me the vaccine, a needle, and a belt, and I think I can figure it out. How To Start A Podcast Everybody is doing it, and it…

A Guide To Remove Dale Carnegie’s Theories — We all have read How To Win Friends And Influence People, and it has become overwhelming. We know too much for our own good. That’s why I, Dull Canary, wrote How To Lose Friends And Wrongly Influence People. …

The rehab facility for unsolicited nude senders like you to help keep your private parts private — Hello, welcome to Nobody Wants To See It — the rehab center for creeps, politicians, and celebrities who can’t stop sending unsolicited nudes. You’re an unsolicited nude sender, so I know what you’re thinking; is this another place where I’ll be barred, exposed, and sent to HR for “accidentally” sending…

I started performing stand-up comedy eleven months ago, and I’ve been ecstatic ever since. I never thought I’d be a professional comedian, traveling the world, performing in front of random people, and turning down cocaine. But in hindsight, it was bound to happen, the comedy, not the cocaine. I’ve struggled…

Hey neighbor, it’s weird seeing you here. Just kidding, I’m at your front door. I’ve noticed you’ve been doing a ton of housework lately, and I wanted to make sure this wasn’t some crazy competition. In the last two years, you’ve fixed your roof three times, you’ve started a garden…

Look, I know you applied to one specific job on Indeed, but I have a job for you that’s entirely unrelated to any of your work experience. I know it’s too good to be true, but you’ll be making $35 an hour once you go through this five-year hiring process…